Under the Layers and Lies - Irony

It’s funny how one second I can feel so absolutely beautiful, so completely sure of myself and the next I turn back into this.

These pages were never really intended to be read by anyone, as I said before I need a hobby and I need something to prove me wrong and give me some sense that my story will live on. That I am not irrelevant, that I made a difference in this world…
Make a difference in the world?

Yes! I cannot bear leaving this world exactly as it is. I guess that makes me more religious than I ever thought I was, in a sense that I need to believe that I am here for some ‘reason’. I need to believe it matters what I do, not her version of “get over it – we are just a mixture of chemical reactions”. Humph, it seems ironic that she of all people uses chemistry against me.

Just in case, from this moment on I shall no longer make it easy for you.
There she goes again, always loved the challenge, but yet again so did I. The only reason our competitive nature never got in the way of our friendship is because we are the same person. I do love her, but if she was anyone but me – I’d hate her just as much as sometimes she hates me.

No more references to which personality it is narrating, that at least protects some of my long kept secrets. Do not worry; it will be easy to separate us from one another now, she is the ‘white’ - I am the ‘black’; she is the combination of all the colors in the universe, and I am the lack of them. But wait some time, see how much some twists and turns can conceal.